Do you and your partner sometimes argue because you think he “doesn’t show you enough attention”? Does your partner feel like, sometimes, you really don’t try to understand them? If those relationship problems sound familiar to you, this article is for you!

Unfortunately, such misunderstandings are very common among couples, because we all express our feelings differently. The way people act and react vary immensely depending on their personality, which can explain a lot of awkward situations that could have been avoided if you and your partner knew your respective love languages.

If you currently have a crush on someone, you can also try to determine what their love language is, which won’t only help you successfully being a new relationship, but will also help you lay the foundations for a healthy one.

How to use love languages to have a successful relationship?

Once you’ve identified you and your (potential) significant other’s main love languages, avoiding useless arguments will be much easier.

  • Tell your partner about your love language

No one can tell your love language better than yourself so don’t be afraid to share your knowledge with your partner instead of waiting for them to guess. Help them understand what you need. In other words, help them love you because that will sweep away many frustrations.

  • Know when your partner is showing affection

Some acts of love and kindness can, if you have no clue about your partner’s love language, go completely unnoticed.  Your partner may then feel offended, or worse, incompetent, but you won’t understand why because according to you, it really wasn’t a big deal. You two have to learn to detect the signs to fully appreciate one another and to have a successful relationship.

  • Speak your partner’s love language

Every now and then, even if it doesn’t come naturally to you, it can be good for your relationship to speak your partner’s love language. The most important thing for a successful relationship though, and it’s no secret to anyone, is knowing your partner well. What kind of date do they like? How do they like to receive gifts? What kind of words stimulates them? Love languages are just a tool to help you communicate better.

So what are the 5 love languages?

1- Positive affirmation

This is your main love language if you feel most loved when your partner encourages you, compliments you or congratulates you on things you’ve accomplished. You prefer verbal communication and need your partner’s loving words to feel reassured. Naturally, you easily spread kind words around you.

2- Acts of services

That’s when you definitely think action is more important than words and for that matter, you feel especially loved when your partner helps you out without you asking. It can be as simple as doing the dishes for you when you’re busy or it can be something more serious. You yourself, don’t mind going out of your way for your family and friends, as you want to always be there for them when they need it.

3- Gifts

You feel most special and appreciated whenever your significant other makes you a gift or when they show you materialistic little attention (an object, a coupon, some food, etc.). You believe thoughtful gifts are the best way to show your loved ones that you listen to them and care for them, so you don’t hesitate to make small surprises from time to time.

4- Quality time

You absolutely need to spend some quality time with your partner, some time for both of you to disconnect from the outside world and reinforce your relationship. Working out together, having a date night, spending a cozy weekend at home… the activity in itself isn’t important as long as you get to be by your partner’s side. You also love searching for new, fun or quirky date ideas all the time.

5- Physical touch

You love cuddling, kissing, caressing, connecting physically to your partner and it doesn’t have to be sexual. You may just feel excited when your partner takes your hand or kisses you on your forehead for no particular reason.